Miss Roberta

My dad was one of those preachers who visited his parishioners, but he didn’t just limit his visits to the church folks. He visited the hospitals and those in the community as well. Often when he came back home, he had stories to tell. Many of his stories began with a chuckle. Such was his story of Miss Roberta.

By my Guest Author, my Daddy

I speak of her as Miss Roberta. She was a bedridden lady of memories. With the help of daily visits from another woman, she was able to live alone. She could get to her stove, refrigerator, and kitchen table. Most of her time was spent in her bed or on the nearby sofa.

Miss Roberta was from a small town – a small Christian College town near the edge of the North Georgia Mountains. She could move from her bed to the cook stove and refrigerator. However, she lived alone, and I was her pastor. Through her memories I became a child in the small town of Demorest. I could pick up dreams and hopes and memories which kept her going. Sometimes, I thought maybe the lady was lonely. But then again, maybe she wasn’t. She had friends that I did not know.

One day I saw a mouse running across the corner of her room. I think it had been nibbling at leftovers on the kitchen table. I didn’t say anything about it. Maybe I should have. A few checkups later that mouse jumped off the top over of her bed. “Did you know that you have a mouse?” I exclaimed.

She answered, “Oh yes, that’s my friend. He even comes to my pillow and talks to me.”

Which One Are You?

A Picture of Grace

This story has been on my heart for quite some time demanding to be told. It has been slowly emerging and I could no longer ignore putting it on paper. The heroine is a dear, dear friend who came to the aid of others no matter what they faced. I am sure she endured ridicule and judgment from onlookers as well. This story took place thirty years ago and no feelings, judgments, beliefs, or words said can change the outcome. What is done is done. I hope as you read of these actual events, you take the opportunity to draw back the curtains and take a glimpse into the lives of the people involved. Ask yourself where you fit in this story. Which one are you?

I will admit when I first heard this story, I was not sure how I felt. My first question concerned a faithful follower of Christ taking someone to an abortion clinic for a procedure. As I pondered the onlookers, the crowd who spewed hatred with one breath but proclaimed love with another, the family who was nowhere to be found, and the one who sat by the woman’s side offering unconditional love, that first question dissipated. Which of these proclaimed the love of Christ? I discovered it was the one who offered unconditional love, the one who offered GRACE.  

The thirty-four-year-old woman was accompanied by an older lady as they made their way up the walkway lined with a mob of protesters wearing hate-filled faces proclaiming to speak for God, casting words of stone, waving pamphlets or posters, and yelling, “baby killer.” The woman tried to cover her head from the barrage of hatred that spewed a venomous path in front of her. “I cannot take this. I cannot fight my way through the protesting, screaming crowd,” she cried. A couple of clinic workers led them to the door while volunteers lined the path to provide a shield from the crowd that tried to consume them. Stepping through the doorway was a reprieve from the jeering crowd outside. The older lady took in the scene before her. Girls and women from ages 12 to 30 lined the walls. They all received counseling and given their options. Most had someone by their side. There were sad, empty faces without smiles. She watched the demonstrators through the window. Her thoughts were, “They know nothing about the sorrow of this place. If they were inside, as I am, surely they would show a little compassion for these very upset people who have had to make a decision no one should have to make.” Would they show compassion? Was there anyone who would write in the sand and make the challenge, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

The dejected, depressed woman, then a patient, who walked into the abortion clinic had no support from family, friends, or community. It was not the ideal life of which she dreamed; it was a nightmare. Her father had committed suicide. She had even attempted to take her own life. She sought for acceptance and love, and thought she found it in one brief moment. The woman, divorced, a mental wreck, with a son serving in the military on the other side of the world, was not capable of caring for a child – not physically, financially, emotionally, mentally, or medically. She had no transportation and had to walk three miles to work for meager pay. Her medical doctor and psychiatrist were both in agreement that she would not even be able to handle the pregnancy, much less care for a child if it managed to survive. 

Where was the father? He abandoned her. Where was her family? They shunned her and turned their back on her when she needed them most. Where were the people who said, “You can put the baby up for adoption?” They were nowhere to be found. Where were those who claimed the love of God? They stood at the door and shouted damnation. Did they offer her assistance? Where could she turn?

Then, a hero came her way, a seventy-year-old lady who reached out to her. When the woman looked in the elder lady’s eyes, she saw no condemnation. She saw something she did not see in the eyes of others – love. No, the lady did not know exactly how the disheartened woman felt for she had never ended the life of an unborn child. In fact, the lady who extended a hand of compassion was not even quite sure how she ended up within the walls of an abortion clinic. In one of her books, she recalled the decision of reaching out to the woman with an unwanted pregnancy, “I felt she was near the breaking point. She needed a friend, someone who would not criticize, condemn, or judge, someone to lean on. I tried to be that person.”

This godly lady was an advocate for children’s rights, and a teacher and tutor of underprivileged children – those who had been written off by society – those who were deemed unteachable. No, she did not know how the forsaken woman felt but she had witnessed firsthand the abuse of others within her own community many years before. Even when called to silence, she dared speak for those who could not speak for themselves. 

She was a devout woman of God. She was educated, a professor, teacher, tutor, mother, artist, Sunday School teacher, author, with a degree in psychology and theology. She also had a huge heart of compassion. Her concern was not just in proclaiming the love of God with words, but by living the example of Christ when He ministered to prostitutes, liars, murderers, foreigners, and other reprobates.

Who ministered to the woman who was cast aside by those who should have loved her? Was it the father of the child? Was it her family? Was it those who proclaimed the love of Christ but never showed empathy? Or was it one lone compassionate lady? This champion did not advocate the taking of life. No, she proclaimed the rights of the life of the unborn child AND the life of the woman who carried a tiny person within her womb. She did not take the pregnant woman to abort a baby, but rather accompanied a frightened, lonely, depressed, confused woman to receive help as dictated by her doctors. To one friendless, scared woman, a hero came into her life and promised to love her regardless of the choice she made. This woman needed no condemnation from others for she badgered herself with her own. She had to live with her decision for the rest of her life. Maybe in later years, she wondered if the doctors were wrong. Maybe when she heard a baby’s cry, or a saw a toddler running in the grass, or a teen on the way to a first dance, or a bride walk down the aisle, just maybe, memories stirred and broke her heart all over again. 

The older woman wrote in her account, “no woman should have to face angry people with cruel expressions and loud voices, shouting hatred under the pretense of love.” Wow! What a powerful statement. Was this woman who carried her child for a time not worthy of love? The gospel proclaims she was. Oh, for more people like this dear, spunky, bold, godly lady who dared to stand by a woman who desperately needed a whisper of hope instead of a hiss of judgment.

We have all made wrong choices in life and as long as we have breath, we will make more. Haven’t we all done things behind the curtains that we try to hide from peering eyes? Hopefully when the curtains are pulled back to reveal what has gone on behind the scenes in our lives, there will be a champion standing in the wings for us, a champion who offers unconditional love, no questions asked.

And I wonder, where do each of us fit in this story? Are we the helpless, hopeless woman who has been told she is not capable to carry and bear a child even if she was able to care for it? Her story might have been different had her family and friends offered support. Are we the kind lady who stood staunchly against hatred and offered compassion and grace to a hurting soul? Are we one of the hateful faces in the crowd who cast venomous words with one fork of the tongue while proclaiming God with the other? What IF the those around her offered a helping hand and a bit of compassion instead of condemnation? Would the outcome have been different? Would she have chosen life?

The first few stanzas of a poem by Mary T. Lathrap, 1895 says:

“Judge Softly”

“Pray, don’t find fault with the man that limps,
Or stumbles along the road.
Unless you have worn the moccasins he wears,
Or stumbled beneath the same load.

There may be tears in his soles that hurt
Though hidden away from view.
The burden he bears placed on your back
May cause you to stumble and fall, too.

Don’t sneer at the man who is down today
Unless you have felt the same blow
That caused his fall or felt the shame
That only the fallen know.

I don’t know what happened to the woman in the story. I don’t know her name, her race, if she had any religious affiliations or anything about her family other than what is mentioned in this writing. The champion in this story remained a lifelong friend of our family. I took my children and grandchildren to visit her on occasion, the last being just a few short months before she died at the age of ninety-nine. She was still championing the cause of others and encouraging them, including my grandchildren, to accept no barriers. And she asked them, “Which one are you?” She was not just asking their names or who they belonged to, but in essence asked who they dared to be.
She was a picture of grace.

Lower the Shades

It had been a long day, starting before 5:00 AM. We got everything packed up and started loading the car. That’s when Judge discovered we had a flat tire. Superman came to our rescue, and we made it to the airport with a few minutes to spare. 

We landed in time to stop for a leisurely supper before heading home. After a trip, we always laugh and practice our improvisation skills. Sometimes we even include waitresses or complete strangers in our wild tales. We like to make people smile.

I told the judge she could drive home. When she drives, we get wherever we’re going quicker because she is a mad woman, not mad as in perturbed and spitting nails, but mad as in kind of crazy. We started out. I grimaced a time or two and about put a hole through the floor trying to find a brake pedal on the passenger side. She weaved in and out of traffic. The judge doesn’t go with the flow of traffic, she leads the flow of traffic. 

The darker it got, the more I could feel my teeth grinding together. I said, “What’s wrong the lights?” I didn’t know how she could see anything and was afraid that other drivers wouldn’t see us because the lights were dimmer than they needed to be. It was then that there was a voice from the back seat. You know about back seat drivers – and you know why they ride in the back seat. Red said, “Do you have your sunglasses on?” Now, what kind of question is that?

I tried to give the judge instruction as to how to turn the dials to check the lights. As she turned knobs, I answered Red. I said, “Of course I don’t have on my sunglasses!” as I reached up to my face. “Well, I’ll be! Let me just lower my shades.” 

It was a miracle! Suddenly, the lights were good and bright. I guess the judge found the right dial after all.

Bashful Horse

One of my favorite writers for the Big Timber Pioneer was Byron Grosfield. He knew the Brannin family and got his stories firsthand. His writings are very accurate and give true glimpses into the lives of those who lived around Big Timber and Melville. This is one of his stories of (my great) Uncle Ed.

Article taken from “Yarns from the Yellowstone” by Byron Grosfield 
Big Timber Pioneer, Jan 20, 1982 

A resident of Greycliff, Montana heard his name called as he walked home after dark.  Surprised, he turned around and listened. The voice came from a barn, so he walked toward it and beheld an acquaintance clad in nothing but a hat.

“Well, Ed, Ed Brannin! What’s happened!” he asked. “Where did you come from!”

“Find me some clothes, then I’ll talk,” Ed Brannin answered. This was one of the many times that he showed up at Greycliff to visit friends. He lived up Sweet Grass Canyon, forty or more miles away; he and others in the early 1900’s thought nothing of riding all day to attend a dance.

When shirt and pants were brought, Ed pulled them on at once and explained: “I started from home this morning and rather than ride ‘way around to cross the Yellowstone bridge at Big Timber, I took me a short cut because I knew I could ford the river at Greycliff.  Even though the water was deep I could take my clothes off, then tie them on the saddle, then let the horse pull me across. He’s gentle and that’s what I did. I had no trouble heading him for the opposite bank, I screwed my hat down tight, took a good hold on his tail and away we went.

“It was a cold ol’ swim but I figured I’d get warm again as soon as I got my clothes back on again. As soon as my feet hit bottom, I turned loose of the horse and let him climb out ahead of me. I took him easy, spoke his name so I could catch him and untie my clothes.  Instead of just waiting for me that danged horse turned his head, bugged his eyes at me standing there in my bare, white skin and spooked.”

“The knothead snorted and run off leaving me standing there naked as a jaybird. Without my boots, I didn’t have a chance to corner him. All I could do then was fight mosquitoes and wait for dark. I had to walk barefoot for over a half a mile to get to town here. That cussed cayuse, it’s time he learned something!”

Knowing Ed, I’ll bet he either educated that horse to tolerate naked people, or else he traded him off.

Touch of the Master’s Hand

I laid down on the sofa with my legs pulled up, covered myself with a thin blanket, tucked the pillow under my head and took an afternoon nap – just like my grandmother had done for years. All snuggled down, I felt a sense of complete satisfaction. The old sofa that was covered in cloth that rotted over the years was made good as new – maybe even better.

There is more to this story than a sofa in disrepair that needed to be fixed. This is the story of a master artisan.

One day I received a call, “Hey. Do you want Gommie’s sofa? It needs to be recovered.” What kind of question was that? “Yep. I sure do.”

I had not seen the sofa in years – not since my Grandmother last sat on it or had taken her last afternoon nap on it. I knew it would cost something to get it repaired, but to me, it was worth it. Immediately I called a dear friend whose husband did upholstery. They were very special friends to me. Mr. Charles was one of the most gifted craftsmen I have ever known. My mother would certainly have approved of his precise skills. My friend is an expert artist herself and a mentor. Fabric is her gift, quilts in particular. [How I have wished she would have come along earlier so she could have met my mother. They would have been close friends.] When I told them of the sofa that needed to be reupholstered, Mr. Charles said, “I’ll do it for you as long as you don’t give me a deadline. Just go pick out the fabric.” After speaking with him, I was elated!

When I found just the perfect fabric, I sent them a picture. Mr. Charles said the paisley designed fabric in deep red tones with a bit of gold was perfect for the “contemporary” style sofa made in the 20’s – 30’s era. Even the texture and weave of fabric was fitting.  I left the sofa and fabric in their care and waited very patiently.

It wasn’t long before they called me to come check on the progress. The sofa was sitting on sawhorses and was stripped down to its skeleton. Springs in the back and seat of the sofa were laid bare. Only four of the myriads of springs were tied together. All the other strings that had once held the network of springs had rotted and fallen off causing some of the springs to lie cockeyed. The batting that had been in the sofa was so rotten, a sawdust-like residue seeped through the seams and cushions. One section of the back of the frame was busted. Woodwork on one of the arms was split. The cushions were no good and were so hard, it was not comfortable in the slightest. The sofa needed a complete makeover.

I can tell you, this was a labor of love. Mr. Charles was on oxygen most of the time. He had a long tube that was his lifeline, but he didn’t let that get in his way of doing what he loved. In fact, he thanked me.

When I got the call that he was done, I couldn’t get there quick enough. It was gorgeous. It was perfect. My friend had stripped and refinished all the woodwork. The rich tones of the wood just gleamed next to the posh fabric. The cushions were comfy yet firm. The piping was even and neat. He did leave one thing though; he left the memories intact. I could not have asked for anything greater. Maybe the sofa will last for another hundred years. Mr. Charles was a truly gifted artisan. He was a master!

When I look at the sofa that is just my size, I see the work of the master’s hands. There is expertise in every stitch. The colors, the craftsmanship, and the refinished wood all compliment one another. More than seeing the work of the master artisan’s hands, I see a work of the master’s heart, an act of love.

I often sit on the cushions and rest a bit while having a cup of hot tea or while telling stories to the kids. Sometimes I even lie down for a few minutes and might even steal a quick nap. Memories ooze from the seams and every stitch whispers memories of time spent with Gommie, warm fuzzy memories of cuddling up beside her and listening to her stories. I can see her look at me, smile, squint her eyes, and click her teeth.

Among the memories that fill the room, I am also reminded that I have witnessed the touch of the master’s hand and heart. The gift of a master artisan is a special treasure, but the gift given from the heart is priceless.

A couple of years ago, I took a couple of friends with me to Montana. One day we walked into the Grand Hotel in Big Timber to grab a bite of lunch. Had they seen my face they would have known I was surprised. I asked them, “Do you notice anything particular about the booth seats?” The fabric was exactly like the fabric I selected for Gommie’s sofa. Good choice!

Canyon TV

I remember when we got our first TV in the early ‘60’s from Guy & Cousin Carol when they moved to California and beyond. I thought we were rich! We got to watch westerns and Mama watched Lawrence Welk.

My Guest Author, my Daddy, remembers his first TV too.

In 1935 I became addicted to outdoor TV shows that we had in the mountains. The Sweet Grass Canyon TV was especially great to watch in July afternoons when the wind whispering in the big fir trees and bees buzzing in the flower garden made a better song than the radio. 

That radio was an indoor feature which spoke from a two-foot horn mounted on the log wall to the left of the kitchen cupboard. The Sweet Grass Canyon TV was outdoors, and it was free. It had top rated programs both day and night. The best place to watch it was from the grassy hillside back of the chicken house. There the hill flattened out to make a bed for deer, or cattle, or boys or girls. In the warm afternoon it became a green sofa where a child could lay down and view the Sweet Grass Canyon TV.

The adults in the log house near the foot of the hill had to be content with a static challenged radio while the children were watching the white puffy clouds become horses, or bears, or elephants, or houses and cathedrals. You never knew what you would see next. The programs changed continuously. 

If you thought that watching TV didn’t happen until the 1940’s, you could think again.  It had been set up ages before. It even had sound. Some days you could hear the echoes of a whisper saying, “This is very good.”

School Daze

I was so excited!  I was ready to start first grade and wanted to learn new things and do fun projects. School was where I wanted to be. The first day I headed out with my brothers and sisters.  

Mama packed my lunch. I don’t remember what was in it, but I just bet it included homemade bread (the best in the world, by the way) and maybe even a coveted Maple Stick.  Surely, she included a special treat for such a monumental occasion. 

I have no doubt my mother shed no tears as she watched all of us kids, even her youngest daughter, get on the bus. In fact, I am confident a sigh of relief escaped her lips at the thought of peace and quiet.  When the boys were out of the house, you know it was quiet!  We increased the population on the bus and headed off.  Mr. Brown, the bus driver, would have resigned that morning had he known the torment that would come from those preacher’s kids (pk’s), especially one of my infamous brothers!  But that’s another tale or two or more!

I can still remember the classroom. Desks were lined up neatly in rows and we sat alphabetically.  That meant that I sat in the back. Behind the last row of desks were our mats laid out for an after-lunch nap. 

The first day was a bit disappointing, but I was sure it would get better. The next day was a repeat of the first. I didn’t learn anything! Everything was just a review for me. Many of the kids were not even potty trained, much less already reading. 

Excitement turned to dread. Dread turned to upset stomach. Some folks can fake an upset stomach.  But I assure you – I was sick!  Mama came in to get me up the next morning and I told her I had a stomachache.  After the bus pulled off with my siblings, my pains subsided.  The next morning was the same. By the third morning, my mother made me get up and get on the bus anyway. Oh – that was a mistake. I was warped for life.  

I had so desired to learn but they were teaching things I already knew. There was no challenge – nothing to light that spark of curiosity inside of me. It wasn’t until one of my high school years when I was invited to join an unconventional classroom with only a few select students throughout the county that I finally felt fulfillment in school.

I am thankful for teachers who challenge and motivate their students to cultivate those seeds of interest, creativity and potential and dare to step out of “the box.” My kids and grandkids have had some teachers like that, and I appreciate them. 

Every year when it’s time for the grandkids to start school again, it sparks a memory of my first day of school and for some reason, my stomach mysteriously starts hurting.

Cheap Dime Novels

The young boy turned the page. He gave rapt attention to each word. The exploits of Buffalo Bill and other Western legends seemed to leap right off the pages from the dime novels he read. “One day,” he thought, “I will go west.” The lure of the Western Cowboy culture drew him from the city streets of Washington, DC, where he had grown up. Maybe one day he would be famous.

Harvey Whitton was an intelligent young man, having been educated in the schools of the nation’s capital. He was of mixed race, described as being hot tempered, 5’10”, had a flat nose, dark eyes, thick lips, round face, heavy jaws, a frowning expression and walked slightly bow-legged. In 1893, seventeen-year-old Whitton embarked on his journey, finding work in St. Joseph, Missouri and Greenleaf, Kansas, before arriving in Bozeman Montana in 1894. The summer of 1895, he became acquainted with Frank Morgan, an alias of Frank Straiter (or variant spelling). In the fall of 1896, the two went to work for a ranch outside of Bozeman. After a petty quarrel, Morgan pistol whipped the rancher. A warrant was issued for his arrest. Afraid he would be charged with something worse, he escaped to Madison County. When Whitton got word that Sheriff Fransham and his deputy, Jack Allen knew of their whereabouts, he warned Morgan. Here is the account as noted in the Gallatin History Museum:

“For a number of months, two young toughs had terrorized the Belgrade and Manhattan areas with vicious beatings, saloon robberies, and roadside holdups. Sheriff Fransham learned that the two men might be hiding at Carpenter’s Ranch, twenty-five miles west of Bozeman. When they arrived at the horse ranch, gunfire ensued; Deputy Allen’s gun misfired and, unprotected, he was shot in the head. After further exchanges of gunfire with the sheriff, the gunmen rode off. Dr. Chambliss rode out from Bozeman to attend Allen, bringing him back by horse-drawn ambulance. After many days of agonizing pain and convulsions, Jack Allen died on February 2, 1897.”

Whitton, under the alias of James Hall, made his way to Elko, Nevada where he was apprehended and returned to Montana to serve a sentence of 89 years for the murder of Deputy Sheriff Allen of Bozeman, Montana. While in Montana State Prison at Deer Lodge, he was not idle. He was the mastermind behind heinous schemes he directed from his prison cell. He was instrumental in the orchestration of the Dodson murder, and took part in the Gravelle dynamiting outrages that was part of an extortion attempt to line their pockets with $50,000 from the Northern Pacific Railroad. Whitton claimed that Gravelle had created the plot in 1903 while his cellmate though Whitton himself was actually one of the composers of the extortion letters. 

In 1906, Mel Jowell was sentenced to Montana State Prison. He was a horse thief, cattle rustler, altered brands, and was believed to have murdered a sheriff in Arizona. Paroled in the spring of 1909, he was back in prison by fall. His discharge for that stint came in May of 1911. While in prison, Whitton and Jowell formed a dangerous alliance. Upon Jowell’s release, he stole the life of young Deputy Sheriff Joseph Brannin, his life snuffed out at the age of twenty-eight. Jowell escaped to Phoenix, Arizona under the name of Dalton Sparks, and was arrested on Christmas Eve and returned to Deer Lodge to finish out his prison term.

In the meantime, in 1910, a letter was penned to beg the release of Harvey Whitton. The letter was written and sent on behalf of Dolly, a blind sister of Whitton, who was living at the Young Woman’s Christian Home on C street in Washington, DC. Dolly had only learned of her brother’s whereabouts on her mother’s deathbed when Nellie Whitton revealed to her daughters the events concerning their brother Harvey. Mrs. Whitton was informed about her son after reading an article in the paper in January of 1897 and began the inquiry of her son’s well-being by correspondence with W. C. Latta in Bozeman, Montana. Dolly called upon Grace Thomas, a young business woman, who penned her appeal for the release of her brother. The letter pricked the heart of Montana’s Governor Norris who was in Washington DC for a Governor’s conference. He promised to speak on her behalf. Dotty believed her beloved brother would be released, magically transformed and come to her aid to care for her in her time of need. The Governor’s attempt failed for Whitton’s premature release. However, not long after, he was released for “good behavior.” There was little or no regard given to the fact that during those years he directed brutal crimes from his prison cell. 

Whitton’s release came September 9, 1911, just two months before his former prison mate, Mel Jowell, shot down Joseph Brannin on the streets of Melville, Montana. It is recorded that Whitton went to Butte and lived an “honest life”, at least until the summer of 1912 when once again, he found himself on the wrong side of the law. He did not travel to Washington DC to care for his sister, though the authorities had promised to fund his mission until he could find employment. I would say those ten months were a short-lived “honest life.”

The summer of 1912, Mel Jowell along with another prisoner, John McAdams, were transported to Livingston to testify in the trial of George Ricketts, another prison mate of Jowell’s and Whitton’s charged as a co-defendant in the murder of Deputy Sheriff Joseph Brannin. On the return trip to Montana State Prison aboard the Northern Pacific #41 train, the two, chained together, escaped from a bathroom window on the moving train as it slowed along Pipestone Pass. After the two were separated from their shared bonds, Jowell headed south. Somewhere along the way, he was aided and abetted by one Jim Ross. The two made their way to Elko, Nevada. A series of events led to their arrest. Jowell was arrested under the alias of Rex Roberts. His partner Jim Ross was none other the Harvey Whitton. Whitton had returned to the same place he was captured in 1897 after the murder of Deputy Sheriff Allen. Seems a bit ironic, doesn’t it?

The two were sent back to Deer Lodge, Montana State Prison. Jowell, also gifted with words, charmed his listeners and readers and influenced the authorities by his letters of appeal, and eventually bought his freedom with words and “good behavior.” Whitton continued his life of crime under yet another alias, James B. O’Neal.

The mother of Harvey Whitton never saw her son again, nor did his sister, Dolly, rest in the arms of her beloved brother she so longed to see. Whitton did find fame – not the kind that would make a mother proud, and not the fame of the renown heroes of the West he read about as a boy. He traveled the hidden trails of notoriety with outlaws who left behind women and orphans to grieve in the wake of gunsmoke… and to think it began with a cheap dime novel…

Mal (Mel, Mallie) Jowell (Jewel, Jouel, Joel), alias Dalton I. Sparks, alias Rex Roberts
Harvey Whitton (Whitten), alias James Hall, alias Jim Ross, alias James B. O’Neal

Lessons from the Playground

One of the greatest institutions of education is the playground. Many things learned on the playground, some not go good, can linger for years. Scars often run deep, and hurts can resurface at just a sight or sound. Great friendships are formed on the playground as well, and in later years memories are brought to light that bring a smile and smug satisfaction.

When the recess bell rang, kids scattered, gathering into groups. I learned early on in years that I didn’t quite fit in. When teams were chosen to vie against one another, I was not selected first or even second. No, the end of the list was my territory.  I was usually the smallest, or at least one of them. It irritated me because I knew I had something to offer but wasn’t often even given the chance, well, except by the principal’s son. He lived for the chance that he might catch me and get a kiss, but I managed to escape when I climbed on top of the monkey bars which he couldn’t maneuver too well. 

I have always been one who observes others, and even as a youngster, I found myself delving into the depths to determine what was in the hidden recesses of those with an apparent innate desire to draw attention to themselves. When I remember those who flaunted their strength, I recognize it was just a front for weakness and insecurities. Overbearing boys and girls alike bragged of their popularity and boasted of what they could do for the others who came to their “side.” Some of their peers’ loyalties were rewarded with bubble gum or undeliverable promises. That resulted in short-lived relationships.

The greatest achievers on the playground stage were those who led by example. They were the ones who encouraged the seemingly weaker kids, those who wanted no recognition for themselves but came to the aid of one who was mocked, dirty, or “different.” Yes, those were the heroes in my eyes. They were few.

When my daughter was young, during a parent/teacher conference, her teacher sang her praises. Other students made fun of a girl in their class, but not my daughter! When she finished her work, she asked permission to help the girl who had trouble with her work. The teacher said my daughter made all the difference in the world when she befriended the girl. Not only did the student begin to excel in her studies, but her demeanor changed as she finally felt accepted by someone. Years later, one of the other students told me how all of those in the class admired my daughter. She was not loud, opinionated, mean or intimidated. They remembered her act of bold kindness that spoke louder volumes than all the mockery voiced by many.

Strength is not in a fist that can crush a fragile flower or a tongue that can slash one’s hopes. Rather, it is found in a fragile flower that can soften a hard heart or a kind word that can change one’s world.

Bubbles

One afternoon when our littlest bundle of personality was small, I handed her a bottle of bubbles. She pulled the wand from the bottle, and soapy water dripped down her hands and slid off the tips of her elbows. Then she blew the best she could. You should have seen her face as bubbles floated in the air! Her hands went up in the air as fragile orbs flew around her and were soon out of sight. She didn’t know which way to turn as she chased one and then another, watching them touch the floor and disappear. That little girl oozed with drippy bubbly excitement. She clapped her hands and danced around. “Bubbles.”

You know, that is what happens to time. The years float on the breeze like bubbles. We reach out, not sure which way to turn or what to do as they fly by. When we try to capture one it is quickly gone. We can’t stop time. We can’t catch it. If we could hold it in our hand, it would soon be gone.

I used to think of each stage of life as another chapter. I guess to some extent it is. But it’s more than that. Each chapter is the beginning of a new book – one that someone else has to write. After I make my last entry, the book will continue as someone else takes up the pen and writes their story on the pages of life.  Until that time, I will try to grasp each bubble that comes my way. Each contains a new adventure, or a new opportunity and I don’t want to miss a one.